


Falling Into Place

by ourlegends



Category: Pretty Little Liars
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/F, F/M, LGBTQ Themes, Multi, Non-Canon Relationship, OT3, Polyamory, Pre-OT3, mostly because of the first bit, so the rest is pretty much pg-13, the 'mature' rating is a precaution
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-17
Updated: 2017-02-17
Packaged: 2018-09-22 17:36:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,596
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9618140
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ourlegends/pseuds/ourlegends
Summary: “Instead of leaving one of us with a broken heart, why not just do - whatever thehellthis is - with all three of us?” She says it as if it’s so obvious; as if she’s always known this would be the answer andGod, Spence, I thought you were supposed to be the smart one here?Or: five times Spencer finds herself caught in a love triangle, and the one time things finally fall into place.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Written pre-finale, so this technically diverts from that - but you can interpret the ending as canon compliant or divergent as you would like.

1.

 

Your first night together is bliss.

 

Even now, you’re certain you’ll never forget it. The brush of gentle fingers rising to wipe away your tears, the rough caress of his tongue in your mouth, the hard press of everything that is _Caleb_ above you as your back sinks into the couch: this moment is everything you’ve dreamed of for three long years, and so much more.

 

So of course you don’t protest when he lifts you up, arms solid under your thighs that clench around his waist.

 

You’re never broken apart long enough to want to, even when he lays you back down on your own bed, tumbling after seconds later.

 

It never crosses your mind to stop him while calloused fingers guide your bra off your shoulders, your own clumsy ones already fumbling with the fly of his pants.

 

You don’t think twice once he slides inside of you, palms firm against the curve of your ass as your nails rake down his back.

 

Yet even when you’re lost in this moment, drowning so deep in Caleb Rivers that you can’t see the surface, she’s always there. Somewhere, deep in the darkest recesses of your mind, her name reverberates through the night in an endless mantra: _Hanna, Hanna, Hanna._

 

(You’re sure she’s still on his mind, too.)

 

* * *

 

2.

 

The first time she sees you both together, Caleb’s arm is slung tight around your shoulders. His free hand lies between both of your own, entwined so perfectly that you’re nearly convinced it’s always belonged there - thusly, you can barely think of any reason why either of you should move. Even when she stares you both like you’ve shoved a rusty knife into her gut, until -

 

Realization barrels through the both of you like a freight train, tearing you apart with a strike of lightning. Even though you know why - that it’s for Hanna’s sake, so she isn’t force-fed a front row seat to the best-friend-dating-the-ex-love-of-her-life freakshow you ****must seem like to her now -

 

(It still slides a blade through your ribs, too.)

 

* * *

 

3.

 

It’s not lost on you, how close they’re standing when you enter the barn. Shoulders brushing together, guilty glances barely meeting yours; it should mean nothing. And coming from anyone else, maybe it would.

 

You hang up on Emily without a second thought.

 

But the last thing you expect when she looks up at you (only after Caleb’s _Spence, you need to listen to Hanna;_ you’re not sure why the nickname makes you flinch as if struck this time around), eyes wide and teary, is for her to say:

 

“Stealing that security drive wasn’t because Aria was on it - it’s because _I’m_ on it.”

 

And even though you never want to believe that, you do. Because it’s _Hanna._ Hanna _Jenna can’t hear us she’s blind, all the subtlety of a hand grenade, fool my best friend and you’re dead freaking meat_ Marin. You’ve never completely pulled the wool over each other’s eyes before; sometimes, you’ve wondered if she even can with you. Why start now?

 

You learn how wrong you are seconds later, when watery baby blues narrow to shards of ice that lodge their way into your throat. It’s then that realization strikes: Maybe five years have changed you all more than you thought. Maybe all this time away from Rosewood has done just as much harm as it’s done good, morphed you and Hanna and Caleb into people unrecognizable to your high school selves. On the bright side, at least this version of you doesn’t kiss her big sister’s boyfriends just to be better at _something,_ doesn’t need to pop pills to chase away more than just the nightmares. But then again, it’s not like you’re any better now - fucking your once-best friend’s first love with barely a shred of remorse, falling for him just as fast and hard as any drug you’ve ever taken.

 

So maybe it’s your own fault, the way your stomach drops when Hanna grabs his hand.

 

You can feel Emily’s pitying gaze as you lower your glass - which could really, _really_ use a refill - and mutter, “What do you want me to do, wedge myself in between them on the sofa?”

 

(If only you could.)

 

* * *

 

4.

 

Sometimes, you wonder if you’ll ever be able to be near her without seeing a Caleb-shaped hole again; if you can ever return to what any of you once were without a sting of betrayal shooting through your veins.

 

Because even with everything else going on in your lives - kidnapping, murder, and a fear you haven’t felt so acutely for five whole years constantly whispering in your ear - you still find yourself seeing red at the thought of them together without you, knowledge heavy in your heart that they no longer need you, want you.

 

(Maybe they never even did.)

 

But then you see her face after Caleb comes begging and pleading at your door, so full of regret. You still hear the tears in his voice, long after he leaves, when he told you he turned down a job for you - that even all those years ago, he wanted to kiss you just as badly as you’ve always wanted to kiss him. You choke back a sob when he asks, “Do you remember that night?”

 

( _Of course_ you do. How could you ever forget?)

 

It nearly breaks you when he walks away. The red fades, and all you’re left with is your best friend who broke your heart, and the echoes of your own anguish.

 

It nearly breaks you, even though you’re the one who shut him out.

 

(You still can’t tell if breaking would make things hurt a little more now, or a little less.)

 

* * *

 

5.

 

It still hurts to look at Caleb. You’re nearly certain it always will. It feels like no amount of time or therapy could ever bring you back to what you once had - not when all you could think of when his lips pressed to your head is that they were just against Hanna’s. Not when you know that the sole reason he stayed until you were forced to end the trainwreck of your own love life, is because Hanna said no.

 

Not when you finally told him _I love you,_ quiet and bright-eyed and more _hopeful_ than you’ve allowed yourself to be in years, and he couldn’t say it back.

 

So you tell Hanna to talk to Caleb.

 

You’re still not sure if you meant it.

 

And yet, it doesn’t hurt so much when you look at Hanna this time. Not with her blonde hair bathed in moonlight. Not when she segways to “I had a dream about you,” so effortlessly that it’s as if Caleb had never come between you at all, eyes inexplicably _soft_ when they meet yours head-on for the first time in weeks. (And even now, after everything, all the isolation and pain that lays bared between you - some tiny part of you still can’t help but wonder where this conversation is headed.) “When I was in that place with A.D. I was so tired and scared; I wanted to give up. But then suddenly, there you were. You were all smart, and preppy, and ready to hatch an escape plan.”

 

She smiles, then, laughter but a pallid breath on her lips. You can’t help but echo the sentiment.

 

“I really wish I could’ve been there, Hanna. I wish that I could’ve helped you.”

 

“You _did._ That’s what I’m saying - you, and all you’ve taught me over the years.” She rises from her swing, and there’s a lump in the back of your throat as your gaze follows her silver-swathed form.

 

(Maybe there’s hope for the two of you, after all.)

 

* * *

 

The last thing you expect when you find them waiting in the barn - _again;_ which, really, awakes a sick sense of deja vu (or maybe irony is more apt of a word, in hindsight) - is for things to end like this. The last thing you ever expected was for _Hanna_ to be the one finally closing the gap between all of you; yet, as always, you learn all over again never to underestimate the powers of Hanna Marin.

 

“We had an idea, Caleb and me. With what we feel for him, and he feels for us… and we feel for each other?” (You hadn’t imagined the hitch in her breath then; now you’re sure of it.) “Instead of leaving one of us with a broken heart, why not just do - whatever the _hell_ this is - with all three of us?” She says it as if it’s so _obvious;_ as if she’s always known this would be the answer and _God, Spence, I thought you were supposed to be the smart one here?_  

 

(Maybe it always was, to everyone but the three of you.)

 

You can’t find the words to answer her.

 

Thankfully, you never have to. Words are barely needed for you to end the night with eyes heavy and limbs sated, Caleb pressed against your back once more - but this time, with Hanna’s face inches from your own, too. And you know it’s real, because all your mind ever feeds you is whispers of _it’s your own fault, they’re both better off without you, maybe you really were just destined to be alone;_ never could something so damaged ever imagine an ending this sweet.

 

Yet here you are after all.

  
(Only when your eyelids begin to flutter do you hear it whispered, warm against the shell of your ear: “We love you too, Spence.”)

**Author's Note:**

> This has been sitting in my drafts for months while traveling, so finally posting it is hella cathartic. Hope you enjoyed it!


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